Day 2 of my book 100 Days to Brave. Today it encourages me to be brave so others can. So I’m going to share something that I’m ashamed of…in hopes it will help another.
The other day I posted this picture of the pure joy on this one’s face when I said YES to letting him pull me around the farm…it was in the middle of my yard sale and all that week I’d been running in a million directions…as those of us that work full time, parent, and try to do ALL THE THINGS, do.
He kept tugging my hand. I gave in and I was once again shown how much my kids just want my attention. That’s it! It’s SO SIMPLE.
So, I made a vow to myself to do better.
Last night I sat down for an hour to put Legos together with my oldest son and the little guy joined us. My phone was NO WHERE in sight (this is important). I cannot tell you the DIFFERENCE in their demeanor.
So, this is the part that makes me want to bawl and instead I’m going to choose BRAVE. I’m ashamed and embarrassed that even though I KNOW this I still let it slip. That I’m a part of what makes them act out.
That they get emotional and fight, much in part because they just want my attention. I’m embarrassed that I let such an important thing get out of hand.
The balance, it’s hard parents. But it starts with me admitting I have to do better. No, I can’t play with them all day. I know they will still fight even when I do give them attention. But that doesn’t mean I should just give up because I feel like I tend to their needs ALL DAY. But what I realized is feeding them, getting them to bed, taking them fun places for them to play…it’s just NOT THE SAME as just one hour of focused eye to eye play and attention.
As I write this with tears, I know I’ll make mistakes and I’m not going to get down on myself. But that doesn’t mean I can ignore the truth – there is a direct correlation between giving them individualized time and how they act. And I can’t get better if I don’t become accountable for my part in it.
Cheers to all the parents doing their best, getting ready for school, keeping their own head on straight during such a hectic time for those little beings that are your WORLD!
I hope somehow admitting this publicly and risking being judged can help another parent just say YES even if the dishes are piling, the laundry is like a mountain, you’ve got business goals not met yet…
60 minutes could change it all.